Welcome to the general discussion forum of the Frederick Health Hospice Grief Support Network! We hope that this is a place where you can feel comfortable sharing about your grief experience, and where you can receive support from others - both from our grief counselors, as well as other people in your community who are grieving. Feel free to share about anything related to your experience, all we ask is that we all work together to keep this a safe and supportive space for sharing.
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I’m a little angry. Tuesday was my loved ones birthday. I have worked very hard to use purposeful, healthy strategies to keep myself from going to a dark place with my grief. I feel this whole Coronavirus got in my way on Tuesday. I feel I couldn’t celebrate or honor my loved one the way I would have liked. I didn’t feel comfortable going to the store to get flowers to bring to the gravesite. I’m trying to teach my kids, model the importance of only doing essential activities. I felt this was an extra luxury I shouldn’t take part in. So I didn’t. I felt bad about breaking my ritual.
Has anyone else struggled with the pandemic interrupting the way you would normally grieve, or honor your loved one on a special date? How were you able to be creative and improvise?
Trish, I can only imagine how difficult and frustrating this must have felt. Birthdays and holidays are tough enough already without your loved one, but a global pandemic makes it especially challenging when you can't perform the grief ritual you had in mind to remember your person.
We are all grieving not being able to see our loved ones as is, but I think it's important to remember that we're also continuing to grieve those who are no longer with us, and grieving the way we used to grieve when we could go out and about!
Thanks so much for sharing this!
Mourning During COVID-19
So much has changed in so quickly. As we all begin to move through these shifts we are being asked to quickly adjust to a new sense of normal, for what seems like indefinite amount of time. We have more questions than we have answers right now and the unease that this creates in us all is pervasive and palpable.
As we navigate these new norms in the midst of COVID-19, we are being asked a great deal. In some circumstances the safety protocols put into place dictate that we must remain separate from those that we hold closest and most dear to us, even when they are critically-ill. Social distancing restrictions have begun impact our ability to mourn in the way that we are used to—at our loved one’s bedside or even during memorial services alongside others that knew and loved this person with you.
In the wake of these changes how do we allow ourselves the space to mourn the loss of our loved ones?
Before we explore this, we would first like to acknowledge the distinct difference between grief and mourning. Often these words are used synonymously, when in fact they are different. Grief refers the complex tapestry of thoughts, feelings, and emotions that are triggered by loss.